Hawngry

Today was nonstop. No time to do anything except the next thing that I was scheduled to do. Unfortunately nobody scheduled lunch. So by six o'clock, I was hawngry (technical term expressing extreme hunger, usually pronounced with a slow, growly voice with emphasis on the first syllable, and wrapping the mouth completely around the aw).

I went to the drive-in at Uncle Sam's BBQ and ordered a jumbo barbeque chicken sandwich. The voice said with sincere regret, "I'm sorry, we are out of . . ."

I was sure he was going to say they were out of barbequed chicken. I was crestfallen, if one can be crestfallen at a barbeque joint. But the voice finished, "jumbo buns."

No problem. "Just give me two regular size." It seemed like a logical compromise. Especially when your stomach is collapsing faster than Rush Limbaugh's polling numbers.

I rushed into the house with my sack 'o sandwiches, lay back on the sofa out of sheer weakness, unwrapped a sandwich on my chest, and started to take a bite. One thing about Uncle Sam's, they don't skimp on the portion of meat they stuff in a sandwich. That is a wonderful thing. However, it does not work well when eating a sandwich while lying on one's back. Before the sandwich reached my waiting, quivering mouth, my neck straining to lift my head forward like one of those gunslingers who had been shot in old westerns and somebody tried to give them water out of a canteen, about a quarter cup of chopped barbequed chicken fell onto my chest, which was still protected by my white cotton dress shirt.

After eating the chicken off of my chest, a bit like fine dining at a table covered in a white cotton table cloth, I got up and changed clothes, a bit too late. I then wolfed the two sandwiches down.

Now my stomach is too full. Sleep will be more difficult.

My mistake was that I had no discipline when I ordered. One sandwich would have been perfect, but the decision born of hunger skewed my judment. I took more than I needed, so much that it was actually bad for me, because a few minutes before I had nothing. Then for a second I thought even Uncle Sam's could not give me relief. My insecurity was raised. The answer was to get more than I needed. My hunger made me impatient. I should have changed clothes. Some would say I should have eaten sitting up, but I'm still not so sure about that . . .

I had nothing, so when I could, I took more than I needed, so much that it was harmful to me.

You ever notice how the pendulum swings? It is often said about power that shifts from one side to the opposing other and back and forth and back and forth. Or opposing ideologies.

Political parties tend to mark regaining power by grabbing far more than they need, so much that sometimes it hurts.

And the pendulum swings from extreme to extreme, with little consideration where it should actually stop.

I gotta go soak my shirt now.

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