Getting to know you . . .

When I was in Lithuania I was walking down the snowy sidewalk one morning and came to a stop on a corner. Crossing the street on the other side of the intersection was a young woman walking briskly. She was pushing a stroller. When she passed me I looked into the stoller to look at the beautiful baby bundled up inside. The woman slowed down, then stopped. I told her that her child was beautiful. Our attempt at conversation quickly proved that we did not speak the same language. But as I admired her baby, a big smile broke out on her face. That was a language I understood. Anyone in the world would have understood. We went our opposite directions, both feeling a little warmer I think.

I talked with a friend today who just returned from a trip to the middle east. Today's conversation was just a brief talk by our standards (less than an hour). But there was one thing she said that struck a chord with me. She reminded me that the world is so beautiful and so big, and most of us have created a world for ourselves that is so small. She reminded me that people are basically the same all over the world. I sense, and hope, that it will be impossible for my friend to fit herself back into the small world she left a couple of weeks ago. She seems to have found herself again as she rediscovered the world.

I was eating lunch with another friend today. We had been dealing with the darker side of humanity for most of the morning. So we had to talk basketball for a few minutes just to regain some balance. Then my friend jumped from the backcourt into the deep end. "Is it part of the Muslim faith to hate Christians?" he asked. I told him I didn't think so. He said he didn't think so either. "Then why do so many people say that like, 'of course you know it's true'. Why is it we have to come up with people that we can hate?"

I don't know. I admire my friend because instead of accepting the assertions of others he has been trying to learn the truth. But I have been thinking about what my friends said today. Both conversations were much more than I will relate. It is grace to have friends who challenge you.

It is true you know. Wherever you go in the world, mothers hold their new babies and look into their eyes. Parents worry about the health, safety and future for their children. Children love to play. Everyone loves to sing. Everywhere you go people laugh and cry, love and grieve, worry and celebrate.

A while back I said that you are welcome anywhere if you have a box of Krispy Kreme's in your hands as you enter. I don't know if that is universally true. Some cultures may be a bit more health concious. But most places, i imagine so. Or flowers. Or coffee. Or wine. Or bread.

The problem is we don't know who we don't know. That can be the neighbor across the street, the folks from across town, up north, or in another country. I think one of the reasons we are so willing to believe lies about others is so we have an excuse not to try to know them. Relationships do not come cheap. There is a cost. The safe boundaries we have drawn for ourselves must be crossed. It is painful to get close to others who are in pain. Perhaps we will have to share the pain. Or do something about it. Something must be given. Or, God forbid, given up.

What we have forgotten is that so much more is gained.

Our humanity.

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