Saturday morning again. Sipping some wake up coffee after sleeping later than I have in as long as I can remember. I visited with Vann at Vanderbilt this week so maybe it was the college influence. It was high quality sleep, except I finally was awakened by a dream about my car spinning out on the interstate. Nobody hurt. But I think I'll stay at home this morning.
There seems to be themes that appear in my life if I pay attention. This week the theme word is "conversation."
I posted about conversation earlier in the week. I did not mean to. The word just came to me out of the blue as I rambled through thoughts trying to bust through a writer's block.
This week I had conversations with a couple of friends that had been on my mind. One is a lifelong friend. The thing about being a lifelong friend is that you don't have to go through much preamble or explanation. You can just cut right to the chaste. When your earliest memories include contests about who can pee the highest and farthest there is a knowledge that never goes away. Sometimes when I feel like I have lost my way as a fifty something adult, I can find myself by talking and listening to a friend who knew me before all the scars of the journey took their toll or knocked me off the trail. They remind me who I really am. It is hard to bluff a life long friend. The contests have changed (peeing contests are for younger prostates). But I hope the conversation never ends.
The other friend I have known for a few years. But in that few years this friend became a best friend. We know things about each other that no one else knows. We had not conversed in a couple of months. The thing about best friends is that no matter what else is going on, the best friend status is the bedrock. It is the non negotiable item too precious to jeapordize, because it is no small thing to be able to share your true self with another human being without fear. This conversation was just sharing: work, family, the stuff of life. We shared enouragement, concerns and laughter. The conversation was as warm as the golden sunlight streaming into the window that afternoon. I hope that conversation never ends.
Then there was the David Wilcox interview I posted about yesterday. One of the cool things he said was that songwriters do what they do to start a conversation. I know that is true. The same is true of bloggers.
I am spending my traditional Saturday morning on the sofa, drinking coffee, listening to Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, and getting my political fix watching the Senate debate about the financial stimulus package. When I wrote that line, "stimulus package" I suddenly thought of both of the above referenced friends. As different as they are, their initial response would have been, with appropriate motions, "I"ll show you a real stimulus package," or something equally as inappropriate. Or in fairness I may have beat them to the punch. None of the Senators have used that line. At least in front of the cameras.
Anyway, on the floor of the Senate there is a debate that is just a microcosm of the debate that is taking place all over the country; what to do about our national life, our economic security. Each Senator, no matter how caustic or pointed his or her remarks may be about the opposition, addresses the other Senator as colleague and friend.
I like it. The problem is that we are not used to it. There has been no real national conversation for a decade, so we are a bit out of practice. The talking heads salivate as they pick apart the debate. Disagreement is somehow viewed as a bad thing. Compromise is seen as weakness or loss. Holding ground on a position is seen as unnecessary stubborness.
But that's what good conversation is sometimes. Disagreement. Unique postitions. New information. Calling bluffs. Expression of disappointment or anger. Challenging motives. Reminders of true self. Arriving at the best solutions, which usually comes from compromise from both parties. And ultimately preservation of the relationship, which is the bedrock.
This debate and national conversation is a good thing. We just have to get used to it again.
So I have had my alone time this morning. I'm off to find a conversation. Just not on the interstate.
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